The Single Girl Reason To Celebrate V-Day: The End Of Couples’ Season
February is right around the corner, which only really means one thing. It’s not that we are approaching the shortest month or a potential leap year, but rather, we are approaching the chocolate-and-teddy-bear-filled, pink-and-red throw-up that surrounds Valentine’s Day.
Now, I realize that statement makes me sound super anti-love. As a lifetime member of the Singles Valentine’s Day Club, I speak from experience when I say Valentine’s Day is just another day.
Though, as a single person, it’s a day when you have to make sure you aren’t wearing black so your coworkers don’t think you are some love-hating cynic just because your wardrobe centers on a color that signifies mourning and rebellion.
On Valentine’s Day, people in relationships will sit in heart-shaped hot tubs and share chocolate-covered strawberries while sipping flutes of champagne. Other couples will slurp spaghetti noodles until their lips touch.
There will be floods of flowers in your office mailroom and there will be the sappy, paragraphs-long, picture-ridden, over-sharing statuses on Facebook about how awesome Peggy Sue’s boyfriend is.
In the midst of all of that, you, too, have something to celebrate: the end of couples season.
Think about that Halloween party when you dressed like Katniss, sans Peeta; during fall, when all you wanted was to have that apple-picking love; Thanksgiving, when the third married, child-ridden family member asked who you were dating; Christmas, when your siblings were off at their significant others’ and you were sitting there with your parents, watching “It’s a Wonderful Life” for the fifth time of the week.
My friends, those days are behind us. Valentine’s Day reminds us that the holidays — and the time of year when a significant other feels so necessary — are over. After Valentine’s Day, you don’t need a plus-one until next October, when you want someone with whom to wear an all-denim outfit and be the Britney to your Justin.
In no way do I want to take away from the romance behind Valentine’s Day, as I hold faith that one day, I’ll spend the greeting card holiday holding hands and smooching, as falling snow dots our cheeks and eyelashes.
So, yeah, Valentine’s Day should and will still be a celebration for those in love, but it can also be a celebration for those who aren’t.
On February 14, the single population will party in respect to the turning point that marks the beginning of the rest of the year with drinking holidays and random Mondays off of work. (I truly don’t understand why we are off on Memorial Day and Labor Day, but not Veteran’s Day or Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, but that’s a conversation for another day.)
On Valentine’s evening, there will be drunk bimbos populating the bar scene (along with the guys trying to score off of their vulnerability); there will be herds of women flocking to see “50 Shades of Grey” with bottles of tequila hidden in their purses; there will also be those hiding in their sweats, drinking wine and watching “The Notebook.”
And, while I have admittedly spent the past several single Valentine’s Days getting too drunk at a movie theatre and having solo, girl-band after parties in my living room, this year, I plan to stick with the few and the proud: the people who are treating Valentine’s Day like Y2K.
Whether you go to a club and drink away the remaining brain cells you have, or have a Galentine’s night (because “Parks and Recreation” nails that one), or spend too much money having a nice dinner in a restaurant amongst couples, there is no reason to be sad because, like the phoenix, the season of the summer fling is right around the corner.
So, cheers to the dwindling days of feeling like a minority, and let break-up season begin. It’s time for that one practically-married friend to have that post-boyfriend wild streak and socially acceptable reasons to day drink.